Today we at ZPDN are very excited to bring you our initial review of one of the most lethal blades we’ve ever seen: The Reaper from Zombie Tools!
One look at their site and you’ll realize that the guys over at ZombieTools are kindred spirits in our fight against the shambling undead. These guys take the necropocalypse seriously, and they have the weapons to prove it. We’ve been dying to get our hands on these death-dealing devices for a long time now.
Here’s how Zombie Tools describes The Reaper:
This 4-foot tool is truly an instrument of death. Cut from quarter-inch spring steel, she barely notices when you hit bone. With black leather wrapped around the handholds of the aluminum slab grip, this 6 pound piece of potential violence makes one ooze badassery just holding it.
My wife’s birthday came up, and if a present of a 4-foot instrument of death doesn’t say “Happy Birthday!” I don’t know what does. My wife has had her eye on The Reaper for more than a year now, and this was the perfect opportunity to arm please her on her big day.
The first thing we noticed about The Reaper is the weight. This blade feels heavy. This isn’t like a Cold Steel sword; this thing is solid from tip to tip. (And please don’t get us wrong; we like Cold Steel blades. We just like this one so very much more.) One of the reasons The Reaper is so heavy is that it has a full tang blade, meaning that the metal in the blade runs all the way through the weapon – all 4 feet! This is one way to differentiate real blades from showy props. The last thing you want in the zombie apocalypse is a blade with a rat-tail tang. The grip, made from aluminum, blends almost seamlessly with the tang of the blade. The handle is almost the perfect width for my wife’s hands, and fits very comfortably in mine.
The blade of The Reaper has a very solid feel, and very little flex or bend even under severe pressure. The blade is thick enough that you don’t need to worry about it breaking under a twisting pressure. We also love the decoration on the blade – it adds just the right distressed look to the blade. Don’t let that distressing fool you – this blade is more solid than any we’ve handled before. On the handle this distressing takes on a
dimensional quality, actually digging small groves into the aluminum. When we first unboxed it, my fear was that this distressing could perhaps cut the wielder’s hand during normal use, but after rubbing my hand over the handle my fears quickly vanished. The guys at Zombie Tools clearly made this weapon to be handled, and there are no burrs or jagged spots on the handle at all. The distressing grooves actually add to the grip of the blade, making it easier to handle, especially when your hands are wet.
The black Kydex sheath, which covers just the blade, is better than I expected. Even though the sheath stays on the blade quite securely by itself, my wife plans to secure this even further using a clasp near the bottom of the sheath in order to ensure that it stays in place during practice with the weapon.
That brings me to another point – it would be wicked awesome to be able to get a training blade appropriate for drills and workouts – something not sharp, nor very pointed at the end. The real thing begs to be drilled with, given its weight, but it is dangerous enough that I don’t want to spar with it. A training “blank” with about the same dimensions and as heavy or heavier than the real thing would be the perfect training tool.
I’m a big fan of customizing weapons, and another customization that would fit The Reaper well is to be able to attach the sheath to the blade via a paracord lanyard. Thus when you need to pop it off to lop the heads of a mob of stenches, the sheath will stay attached to the blade and won’t get lost in the fracas. The other customization the blade begs for is a carry strap. This blade is likely longer than your rifle, and it’d be only natural to strap it on your back. The Kydex sheath is threaded with eyelets, so these will be useful in making some of these customizations.
The Reaper really lives up to its picture – this thing is hardcore to the bone. You know that game people play where they say:
“Look to your left. The first object there is now your weapon in the zombie apocalypse. How screwed are you?”
(What, you’ve never played that game? You clearly have never been to my house.) I want to keep this Reaper next to me all the time now. But my wife isn’t letting go of her new baby any time soon, so I’d better get myself my own blade from Zombie Tools. Hmmm … the Hellion sure looks awesome!
One last thing we want to mention is the killer customer service we received from Zombie Tools. Blades this awesome take time, and with Christmas back-orders, I was expecting to get the blade a few weeks after my wife’s birthday. The guys there worked their tails off to get this blade to me by her birthday (thanks Chris!) and they were awesome to work with. These guys care about their craft, a point made clearly when you heft their blades. We hope they keep outfitting mankind to deal with the undead threat for years to come.
We’re trying to work out how best to test out the Reaper’s cutting power in a weapons test, and as soon as we figure that out we’ll bring that to you. Until then, Zombie Tools gets the ZPDN seal-of-approval!
The verdict: 5 out of 5
What’s the best zombie-slaying weapon you’ve ever encountered? Tell us about it in the comments!